So-called poetry

Acrostic poem

sulphurman

So this weird thing happened. You might know Maria from the blog, randomlyabstract. If you don’t, then do visit her blog. She is one of the best writers I have come across. Really gifted. Her poems are just wow.

The other day she posted an acrostic poem Truly Yours

As usual, I was up to no good, and ended up spamming her comments section with a weird acrostic poem kind of contraption of my own. Rather than telling me off, she gracefully suggested that I should try to write an acrostic in Urdu. As my Urdu knowledge is practically nada, I said that I might try to write one in Hindi, to which she agreed. So, here it is:

Tujhe yeh kasam di thi maine
Aisi ek kavita likhoonga 
Koi doosri bhasha mein nahi 
Hindi ke shabdon mein rachoonga
Aisi kavita jo kar de madhosh
Labon pe jab bhi kisi ke aaye 
Lahoo se bhi ujjwal jiska rang ho 
Urdu jaisi dhwani tarang ho, aur   
‘Salim’ ki rooh hamesha jiske sang ho

Now, I know what you must be thinking. Haha, what a moron! I know, I am one. So, after all that bravado, I actually did try to write one poem that will supposedly leave you “madhosh.” Needless to say, it turned out be something akin to those you find written on those paper slips the local channawala gives you #epicfail. Here it is:

Na koi khushi hai
Aur na hai koi gham
Jeene ki himmat nahi
Na marne ka hai dum
Kaisi uljhan hai yeh
Bataa duniyawale
Nafrat toh bahut ki,
Pyar kabhi na hua kam

P.S. These are my first Hindi poems ever. So be gentle 😀

Published by sulphurman

I wish I had a cool job like a dragon-tamer. But I don't. So, I have to be content with being a chemical engineer.

41 thoughts on “Acrostic poem”

  1. Truly Yours is really good though I have to admit I looked for your poem through the comments first! I don’t know how you churn out that stuff from your brain. All this sulphur must have taken it’s toll.

    I didn’t see the acrostic link in your second hindi poem, which according to you is an #epicfail, but I adore it! It is splendid and hits hard and is one of the best combination of words I’ve come across recently in Hindi. I don’t do much Hindi reading by the way. Just saying. 😉

    It’s emotional. You do emotional well. 🙂 Yes, stop dancing now!

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    1. The second one was not supposed to be an acrostic. I thought it came out cheesy. So apparently you don’t mind a bit of cheese 😛
      And yes all that sulphur must have addled my brains. I truly am a behuda aadmi.
      Haha, in all seriousness though, thank you for your kind words. Before this blog, I only dealt with the emotional. Now, can I do a little jig? Just a couple of steps?

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      1. I love cheese. My metabolic processes make sure that the cheese doesn’t leave behind too much fat 😉 Jeez! Am I becoming like you? Why did I just say that? And then not remove it?

        I also love cheese names! They sound so weird and I can never remember which is which and why. Amul cheese is the best 😉

        I think behuda aadmis are allowed little jigs. :p

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      2. I am pretty contagious. Oh, I can’t remember the cheese names either. On top of that I can’t spell them. How many z’s are there in Mozzarella? Or how many l’s. Geez.
        Oh, thank you. A little horse dance on the way.

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      3. Haha! To me Mozzarella looks just fine the way you’ve spelled it. Anyway, who really cares? They made spell check just about everywhere for those who know how to spell. And for those who can’t, well they’re the ones who came up with WYCM, ROFLMAOSTC, SWYP. Well, you get the point.

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    1. Oh, thank you 🙂 I must have gotten better by the second time haha.:P
      But seriously though trying something new is fun. I wish my school Hindi teacher Mr K P Singh was here. He would have said, “Kavita likhne se kuch nahi hota. Usey gaa ke sunao. Tab kavita ka moh pata chalta hai.”
      You’re welcome.

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  3. What a weird coincidence : I have been experimenting with poetry recently too. But you are on another level with acrostic poetry and mine is just plain rhyming (I know old school). Both good but since I have a preference for rhyming words, I shall say I like the second one better ;). And kudos on attempting in Hindi. You did a good job. I shall stick to English though 😛

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    1. Oh, trust me. My level is a don’t-go-there level (whatever that means). I don’t really do poetry. I’m mostly interested in reading poems and then spending hours coming up with silly interpretations.
      But thank you. And don’t forget to share your work.

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      1. Same here mate. At least you were brave enough to publish and a good thing you did coz that was not bad for a beginner.Not at all.I don’t think I shall be publishing mine though. Its just written for me to go back and read it and feel good sounding all Robert Frosty 😛 When in reality it might be a nursery rhyme haha

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  5. Woah o.o what a coincidence just this morning,I was thinking of writing an acrostic poem in URDU.

    Both of them are just great!
    Is it just me…the word BHASHA sounds so cool. 😎
    It felt a bit different reading a Hindi poem, enjoyed!

    The second one is ahmazing.
    Now I guess there is going to be a Hindi category on your blog. 😛

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    1. Ah, thank you. You are too kind. You like the word bhasha? haha. Never thought someone would say that. Zubaan sounds so much sweeter, no?

      No, no. If I ever manage to come up with something else, I’ll put up a category. For now this is it. 🙂

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  6. YALLAH that’s a lot of praise you’ve done there. Thank you. So much.

    And look at that Hindi kavita! It’s absolutely brilliant. Matlab, I read this so many times. The acrostic I mean. Takhallus. Lahoo se bhi ujjwal jiska rang ho, Urdu jaisi dhwani tarang ho. The first four lines. Basically there’s this khalis/classic/original feel to it that makes it exactly what it talks about.
    The channawalay ke paper slips have ‘kabhi khushi kabhi gham’ material tho? :p

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    1. I was being honest. You are good. 🙂
      Haha, if you say so. After three lines, it was a choice between Takley and Takhallus. Somehow, talking about bald guys in my first Hindi poem didn’t seem too attractive.
      Oh, you should see the channewaleys of my place. They always seem to buy the notebooks of out of work poets and jilted college lovers.

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